Boudoir, for the most part, is a solo adventure. That makes sense: my clients do boudoir for a variety of reasons, most of them personal. Even when they want to do it as a gift for a partner, most of the time they want it to be a surprise. But couples boudoir photography? That’s much rarer — and it shouldn’t be. I would love to see more of my clients do couples boudoir photos.
In the photography world, couples portrait sessions far outnumber solo portrait sessions. Engagements, maternity, even “just because” — just not couples boudoir. Yet among my boudoir clients, couples account for only maybe 5%.
If you ask me, way more people should do couples boudoir photos. Some benefits:
Exploring intimacy
It’s a chance to connect with your partner and have those moments preserved in a beautiful way. It doesn’t need to be sexual at all. No skin needs to show. The most important part is the connection between you. Just doing this session together leads to a bonding experience you’ll share forever and can even deepen your relationship.
No acting necessary — not much, anyway
In a couples boudoir session, my goal is to help clients find real moments together and then get out of the way as much as possible. Of course I still give directions when necessary to help create the best images, and some couples need more guidance than others. That’s ok! It’s my job to help as much or as little as my clients need.
It’s a non-conventional badge of honor
Boudoir photography lives outside the mainstream. I see anyone who does even a solo session as a brave explorer of the unknown. With couples boudoir even rarer, that only cements your status as boundary-pushing rebels. Hyperbole? Maybe. But you get the point.
Of course, couples boudoir is not for everyone. I tell clients all the time that you need to be excited for the experience, even if you also have some nervousness. That goes double for couples. Both partners have to want to do it for it to work; otherwise, the connection isn’t there.
Plus it may not work for you to have these real moments of connection in front of another person. Totally understandable. In the best moments, couples almost forget that I’m there.
How spicy can a couples session get?
Every photographer has different thresholds about what they’ll agree to shoot in a session. For me, I only draw the line at actions that will hurt someone non-consensually (I absolutely support consensual kink). I’ve shot couples sessions from completely innocent to explicitly sexual and pretty much everywhere in between.
Most importantly, make sure you’re in sync with each other about what you want to express through your images. Know what each other’s goals, preferences, and limits are, and ideally communicate that to your photographer. The more we know, the more we can help you.
Every type of couple
At my studio, I welcome every flavor of gender and sexuality. Love is love.
What about group/poly boudoir sessions?
Just like with couples boudoir, make sure everyone’s on the same page and excited to explore this amazing adventure. And check with your photographer too. I welcome it but not every photographer does.
So next time you’re thinking about a couples portrait session, consider venturing into the less-traveled world of couples boudoir. Be the badass trailblazers in your friend group!
